5 Tips To Keep Traveling With Your Partner Amazing!
Very early on in our relationship, my husband Brian and I realized that we both loved to travel. I was pleasantly surprised to meet someone who can pick, pack and hit the road as quickly as I can. Nice. But just because we both love to travel, doesn’t ensure a string of seamless adventures. In fact, I believe traveling with your partner can either make or break a relationship.
East End, Long Island
A little background… We’ve both been married before so we have a combined family of 5 children, 4 in-laws and 6 grandchildren with a new one on the way! We have a great blended family and we absolutely love our time with them, so we’ll always keep a home base on Long Island. Although we’re not full time travelers, we do spend a lot of time ‘on the road’. Everyday life brings on commitments, responsibilities and challenges. At home, the outside world takes over with kids, grandkids, parents, business, etc… Taking the time to get away gives us more time to focus on our relationship.
Having spent some time testing these theories, here are some tips to assist those of us empty nesters and traveling couples who spend a lot of 24/7’s together. Bickering on the road can happen, but it can be minimal with some planning ahead and communication.
Waiting for Sunset at the Mucky Duck, Sanibel Island
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Choice Of Destination Should Be Mutual (Or Not)
There’s probably loads of destinations that you both would love to see and enjoy together. This is not always going to be the case. Make sure to alternate trips you’ll both love, with some that only your partner is interested in. We are leaving this week for two weeks in Kissimmee, Florida. The main focus is the Mecum Classic Car Auction for Brian. I’ve done Kissimmee/Orlando enough so I wouldn’t choose to do it again. How do I make it work for me? Well, we rented a beautiful property in Kissimmee for two weeks and are getting some of the children/grandchildren to come play with us for a portion of the vacation! I plan to spend a few days at the car show with Brian, but can also spend some ‘Mickey’ time with the grandkids! I can’t wait!! Even if it’s not your choice destination, find something about the experience that you are sure to enjoy!! Sometime in the near future I REALLY want to see the Northern Lights. Brian can’t even fathom a trip where you intentionally go someplace cold! Haha.. I’m thinking Iceland. I’m sure he’ll find something he can enjoy~!
2. Do Some Planning Ahead Of Time
Whether the destination for your next trip is a mutual choice or not, have an idea of what you would like to experience there. Express your wants and make a known plan to do it, either together or apart. There will be plenty of ‘spur of the moment’ that comes up along the way but it’s good to get each person’s expectations of the trip on the table before you leave so there’s no disappointment. Stay loose and be okay with maybe not getting to do everything on your list on this trip. Err to the side of the relationship always.
3. Don’t Have Unrealistic Expectations Of Your Time Together, Conform To What Works
Just because you’re away doesn’t mean that you should spend every second of the day together. Let’s face it… all day, everyday, is ‘a lot’. I keep going back to the prior sentence to change it to ‘too much’, but I’ll leave it at ‘a lot’ because my husband may read this. ( :
At home and away we like to have a little alone time. Brian’s a morning person and I’m a night owl. We’ve learned to embrace this alone time. When traveling, we usually rent a small suite or apartment so we can have some separate space. In the morning he likes to surf the net while watching TV. At night, I like to read and/or write. This separate space goes a long way to keeping us grounded and not killing each other. Respect these rituals!
Portofino Docks
4. Be Supportive When You Do Follow Along, Go With The Flow
Even though it’s okay to spend a little time shopping while he goes fishing, it’s a benefit toward your relationship to try some new things for the sake of your partner. Either try it or maybe just go as a supporter and let your significant other enjoy it. Recently in Grand Cayman, my husband wanted to swim with the stingrays, I said “hell no”! I went with him anyway and thoroughly enjoyed the trip. I watched him from my seat on the boat, camera and rum punch in hand! All good. Find something you can enjoy about it.
5. Don’t Let Little Things Get You Down or Small Arguments Ruin Your Vacation
There are many potential hazards that come with traveling. Even if things become stressful, don’t sweat the small stuff. Anxiety over missed connections, lost luggage and the ensuing drama can set the tone for your whole vacation if you let it. Make the best of it and enjoy what you can. A little shared ‘people watching with ad libs’ is always fun! Let go. Be friends, not punching bags. Surely, there is something funny about the experience!
Hangin’ at the Biltmore, Asheville, North Carolina
Thankfully, as the years go on, we get better at compromising. It’s important to remember that each part of the couple is an individual with their own agenda in mind. Leave room for that. If you’re just starting out together or an empty nester reconnecting with your spouse it’s important to handle your 24/7 time with care. While it’s very rewarding to spend quality time together, creating memories, enjoying new cultures, food and experiences, it’s a potential hazard as well. Be prepared for the possible stressful situations and imminent hair pulling, learn to embrace it all, stay positive and have fun! Don’t let the 24/7 of traveling with your partner get the best of you!
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